• Keys to Unlocking the Door to a Healthy and Happy Marriage

    This article was published on November 22, 2011

    Every door requires a key.  And every key is different. The key to my front door won't unlock my car. The key to your office won't open my mailbox.  Marriage requires keys too, but these keys aren't cut from metal and you can't hang them from a ring in your front hall.  The keys to a successful marriage are skills, attitudes and behaviours that all add up a healthy relationship.

    Key number one is time. Giving time to your spouse is essential if you want your relationship to flourish. Is your marriage stale? Do you feel disconnected from your spouse? Does it seem you and your spouse are strangers sharing a house? Maybe your relationship is suffering from time-deprivation.

    Key number two is appreciation. Without sincere appreciation, any relationship will be strained. We all need to know we are appreciated for what we do, or just for who we are. When was the last time you gave true appreciation to your spouse? Do you find it difficult to express appreciation because you're rarely on the receiving end of appreciation yourself? Honest appreciation will make a difference in your marriage and you can learn how to do this effectively.

    The third key is forgiveness. This is a hard one. We all have been hurt at some time by someone else. When we've been hurt, it can be difficult to forgive. And the expression "forgive and forget" doesn't help. We wonder, "How can I ever forget what they did to me?" But true forgiveness has nothing to do with forgetting, but instead it has to do with letting go of things in the past that can't be changed and determining to move ahead in a new direction. Forgiveness? Yes you can forgive.

    The final key is service.  None of us likes the idea of being someone else's servant. And we view serving in a negative light oftentimes. However, learning how to serve your spouse and doing it out of love, can make a change in your relationship. In fact, acts of service may be your spouse's love language and if so, serving them will speak volumes.  

    So now that you have a quick overview of the 4 keys to building a healthy and happy marriage, stay tuned for a more detailed look at each key.  You'll be glad you did.